Newsgroups: talk.bizarre Path: jfwhome!spdcc!newsie.dmc.com!news.sprintlink.net!hookup!news.moneng.mei.com!howland.reston.ans.net!gatech!agis!simtel!noc.netcom.net!netcom.com!rone From: rone@netcom.com (eau d'oeuvres) Subject: Re: X COPIER OF LOVE 2000 Message-ID: Organization: Prels Dental Supply, Miami, FL References: Date: Sat, 27 May 1995 03:25:15 GMT Sender: rone@netcom20.netcom.com In article , Derrick Williams wrote: > - Paper jams should be induced. Display should request that user clear > paper jams even if they don't exist. Once non-existent paper jam mode > is entered, copier should insist that paper be cleared until user gets > department secretary for help. Problem should dissapear as soon as > secretary walks into room. Have R&D work on a secretary detection device. To: Marketing, R&D, OAP From: 5150, Quality Control Now, let's just review the guidelines for secretary detection i've received for this alpha SDD. Steno Pool Junior Exec Senior Exec Secretary Secretary Secretary =========== =========== =========== Keeps hair in Hair hangs loose. Wears hair in bun. ponytail. Comfortable shoes. Fuck-me pumps. "Sensible" low heels. Cotton-blend pants. Non-natural, tight Wool skirt no higher skirt no lower than than mid-calf. knees. Knows what she's Knows where she's Knows where her boss is supposed to do. supposed to be. and what s/he's doing. Makes good coffee. Makes good tea. Makes a great martini. Pontiac Sunbird. Volkswagen Cabriolet. Lexus ES400. Bottom. Switch. Top. Well, now, all we gotta do is dress the male secretaries up REAL PURTY and WE'RE ALL SET, NOW, ARE WE. 5150 fucking college co-op interns are gonna RUIN the place cc: x -- Another victim of invective. rone@netcom.com