From rone@netcom.com Fri Aug 25 23:22:35 PDT 1995
Article: 204129 of talk.bizarre
Xref: netcom.com talk.bizarre:204129
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rone@netcom.com (go away)
Subject: Oh, *i* get it now
Message-ID: <roneDDwMt0.3rs@netcom.com>
Date: Sat, 26 Aug 1995 06:17:24 GMT

It finally set into my brain, exactly why Solberg's goodbye really
annoyed me so much.  No, be honest, you idiot:  it pissed me off.
Yeah, much better.

Not that he's leaving.  Oh, no, that's more of a forlorn feeling,
almost immediate nostalgia, a sense of loss, mourning.  Yeah,
mourning.  He's dead, as far as we're concerned, see.  He's ceased to
exist.  He committed suicide.

But that's merely tragic, not irritating.  No, the whole thing is
a chafing matter because he had the arrogance to dismiss us.  His
friends.  His fans.  Whatever.  I'm sure he has friends out in the
"Real World".  People who admire him should be in no short supply.
But, since we're just an image on his computer screen, a tinkling in
his computer's mailspool, hey, fuck US, man.

"I'm leaving, see, and there's nothing you can do about it, and i'm
leaving because this sucks, see, not that you suck, see, but
everything in general sucks, and my life sucks, and, actually, some of
you suck, see, but that's not your, those of you who don't suck, that
is, fault, but, hey, it happens.  I know i'm telling this to you in
public, but, anyway, don't tell me anything, because i don't want to
hear it, not because i hate you, see, but i just don't like the medium
of communication.  You know.  See?  I decided this would be a good
time to let you know, because i just met you all and i loved meeting
you and you guys are awesome and i know you loved me, see, so it's,
like, perfect closure, see, and i really don't want to go, but i think
this all sucks and, well, i gotta do my own thing.  Ciao."

Thanks a whole lot, pal.  You know we fucking love you, man.  If you
wanna do your own thing, we'll back you 100%.  That's what friends are
for.  But take your formal, straightlaced, apologetic goodbye, crumple
it up, and shove it into your right ear canal with a Q-Tip.  OK?  You
have to go?  Go.  But don't tell us not to care.  Fuck you.  You
matter.  OK?  You work your shit out.  You make sure you come back.
And you make sure that when you DO come back, you come back a happier,
more satisfied person, and much, MUCH wiser, so that you won't be
fucking around with us the next time something "important" rolls along
that merits your full attention.  You're not the only one who thinks
this place stinks to high heaven sometimes.  You're not the only one
whose "real life" is in the pits.  You're not the only one who has
disagreements with other people here.  So learn to cope like an adult.
You proved you were an adult when you handled HOTT.BOB.  Time to step
up to the plate again.  Remember, we're all behind you, 100%.  So go
on and kick ass.

And that goes for any other of you fucking pansies out there with a
problem, OK?  Don't like it?  Send me mail.  Let ME be your fucking
psychotherapist; i promise not to force you to hit <RETURN> twice for
an answer.

5150
anyone who can forward a hardcopy of this to MISTER solberg, please
do.  i'll pay postage.
-- 
I might be crazy over you / and you tell me
No excuse to lose it over you / and you tell me
So impatient wait to light the fuse / and you tell me
