From:     baron blizzard (rone@netcom.com)
Author:   Ron Echeverri
Category: GBBV
Subject:  Friendship
Date:     Tue, 14-Feb-95 / 05:38
  __________________________________________________________________________

Blah blah, friendship is based on trust, blah blah, you really get to
know the person, blah, blah blah, you feel betrayed, blah, life sucks.

You don't really comprehend the drawbacks of being excruciatingly
honest until you're smacked with the reality that almost nobody else
is, and those who are never seem to be so at the time you most needed
them to.

This leads to the dreadful situation of not wanting to be fully honest
because you have no idea how certain people will react to the truth;
while this, in and of itself, is not cause to withhold part of the
truth, sometimes you are (or, rather, i am) invaded with a sense of, i
don't know, nobility, gallantry, whatever.  You don't want to tell
whomever whatever because you don't want to take the risk of mortally
offending or terminally confusing them.  And that just shows that you
_just don't know them well enough_, or else you'd have enough
confidence and/or knowledge to render your doubts moot.  And, if you
don't know them well enough, what the hell are you being honest for in
the first place?  To improve the relationship as friends?  To goad the
person into revealing something about themselves ("i showed you mine,
now you show me yours")?  To disburden your soul?

I will now refrain from quoting Billy Joel.

Doubting about whether to be honest or not, or about how honest one
should be, only leads to unclarity, which only leads to poor
interpretation of your words by the other party.  And you only have
yourself to blame.

        Looking beyond the embers of bridges glowing behind us
        To a glimpse of how green it was on the other side

Alea jacta est, and all that.  What was wrought before must be begun
again.  The friendship must be tended to daily, like a sand castle
must be built anew after every high tide.

And next time, i'll make sure not to get my hopes up so high again.
They can get dashed against the rocks only so often.

5150
with friends surrounded...
... forever and ever
--
I have a fear of flying,
I think I have a fear of him,
I'm afraid of meaning nothing again...