Path: netcom.com!ix.netcom.com!howland.reston.ans.net!cs.utexas.edu!not-for-mail
From: kaitem@sco.COM (Kaite McGrew)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: burning bright
Date: 29 Mar 1995 10:36:00 -0600
Message-ID: <9503290840.aa19658@srv100a.sco.com>

i am not a goddamn tiger. i am not a tiger. 
leaning against the doorframe. kept his thumbs
hooked into his front pockets. i sat on the 
floor with my legs and arms wrapped around the
dog and kissed the top of her head. just me 
and rose. nothing but highway. and i am not
a tiger.

he says i am wild. he says i will never be 
content with anything. he says i might do
okay for a year or two at a nice habitat-like
zoo because they feed me. but eventually,
he says without missing a beat, eventually
you will kill your keeper and take back your
freedom. you are a tiger.

and he swears when i go he will make a twelve
step program for the survivors of kaitie except
this one will cost money and he will finally 
be rich. 

he says my leaving is a relief, a black cloud
lifting from his life. he says he wishes the
Next Guy all the best. and then he gets that
funny look on his face and he says i don't 
need to know this guy, honestly, i can tell
intuitively that it will last maybe two years
before you make your break for it. you are 
not cut out for marriage. you are a tiger. 

and that cocksureshiteating grin just pisses
me off. without thinking, without blinking,
i square off against him and i say calmly
if i have never been content before, it is
only because i have never met anyone like
the Next Guy before. it wipes that grin clean 
off his face, leaving him stunned and silent.
always go straight for the throat.

so, yeah, i may be the tiger,
or i may be the lady.

but more likely i just won't admit there's
a difference.