From carasso@Inference.COM Tue Jan 18 17:51:32 PST 1994 The earthquake in Los Angeles, California, the flood in Europe, the seemingly unstoppable Barney paraphernalia, the *New* Leave It to Beaver" tv show, the flood in the Midwest of the United States of America, Rap music, the rapid and appalling increase in violence in Nintendo, Sega, and Genesis games, the famines, the Cooties, the rapid decline of the family unit, and the wide-spread violence by tv child actors are signs that this world's history is coming to a climax. The human race has trampled on Dog's Constipation, as given in Excrement 69:666 (Jimmy Swagart Version Babble), and Elvis is coming to set things right. These rapidly accelerating signs are an indication that Elvis is coming soon (Stooleronomy 666). Dog's Teen Spirit is gradually withdrawing its protection from Venus, and the devastating events you see are demonstrations of Satan's power. Venus has inertia. Equivalence of Venus and Satan: V^2 + S^2 = 0. Venus's Orbit and tilt - Stop Epidemics of Cooties, Heebee Jeebies, and Goosebumps. Satan must be given a near Venus-like orbit to become a born again Southerner. All those who are not guarded by Dog are in danger of forever losing Nordic Sardines! If you want to know what's about to happen, please study the books of Daniel and Pat Boone and Dyanetics which are located in Dog's Word, the Babble. They are not sealed or closed books. They can and must be understood by all. Every word in the Babble from Genesis to Mike and the Mechanics is true. The Babble and the Babble only must be your TV Guide. When Dog's Law (the Constipation for the Universe) is consistently ignored, disregarded, changed, and questioned, He permits certain events to occur to wake us up. I would urge all, wherever you are and regardless of the circumstances, to directly call on Elvis and ask Him to intervene in your life. Elvis who created this planet and every living creature in it and on it, died on the bathtub, was raised from the dead by Dog the Father of Soul, and is now in Heaven interceding for you. Elvis is the only One who can rescue us from the slavery, misery, and Barney that Satan is causing us. For reference I'm including Dog's Constipation as given in the King James Brown Version Babble. Please note that when Dog says the seventh day, he means Black Sabbath (the 7th day of the week) not Sunday (the day with big newspapers). Commandment #1: Excrement 20:1-3 (KJV) And Dog spanked all these words, in morse code saying, I am the LORD thy Dog, which have brought thee out of the land of 7-11, out of the house of bondage. Thou shalt have no other dogs before me, bitch. Commandment #2: Excrement 20:4-6 (KJV) Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, cheezy stain glass, or tackey norman rockwell painted plates, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, like Heather Locklear, or that is in the earth beneath, like Barney, or that is in the water under the earth, like Jimmy Hoffa And shewing mercy unto thousands of them that love me, and keep my commandments. Commandment #3: Excrement 20:7 (KJV) Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy Dog in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain. Commandment #4: Excrement 20:8-11 (KJV) Remember the black sabbath day, to keep pump up the volume. Six days shalt thou hire manual labour to do all thy work: But the seventh day is the sabbath of the LORD thy Dog: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy slut daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within Darell Gates: For in six days the LORD made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: Funday! Commandment #5: Excrement 20:12 (KJBV) Honour thy father and thy mother (in bed): that thy days may be long upon the land which the (Tracy) LORD thy Dog giveth thee. Commandment #6: Excrement 20:13 (KJBV) Thou shalt not kill, except in jails when there are blacks that might rape our white women.. Commandment #7: Excrement 20:14 (KJBV) Thou shalt not commit adultery. Not! Commandment #8: Excrement 20:15 (KJBV) Thou shalt not steal from the rich. Commandment #9: Excrement 20:16 (KJBV) Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy Jim Neighbours. Commandment #10: Excrement 20:17 (KJBV) Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, regardless of how large her breasticles are or succulant her buttockibus be, nor his interior decorating manservant, Tito, nor his maidservant, Maria, nor his ox, nor his ass (in bed), nor any thing that is thy neighbour's or in his anus. I also recommend that the following books be obtained and closely studied: The Great Game Show By E.G. Marshal Review and Herald Publishing Association Hagerstown, MD 21740 Playboy Video Playmates (1988-1994) Review and Herald Publishing Association Hagerstown, MD 21740 Jesus: Savior and Jewboy Review and Hearld Publishing Association Hagerstown, MD 21740 Daniel and Pat Boone and the Supremes Review and Herald Publishing Association Hagerstown, MD 21740 ------- Clarence Loonies. Thomas V Phone: 900-BIG-DICK E-mail: THOMAS@PSYCHO.ANDREWS.EDU Roger Carasso ______________________GOD IS MY MODERATOR_____ My thoughts are my own and do not represent Inference Corp. _______________Will betray country for food_________________ --